Preface.
A sermon on the conjugal state has gone out under my name, which I would much rather not have happened. For although I am aware that I am preaching from the matter, it has not been put into the pen as well as it might have been. Therefore I caused to change the same and to improve as much as I can. Please, any pious Christian would want to let the first outgoing sermon perish and become null and void. Also, if anyone wants to catch my sermon, temper his haste and let me also advise to spread my words. There is a great difference between bringing something to light with a living voice or with dead scripture.
A Sermon on the Marital Status.
1. first, when God had created Adam and brought all the animals before him, among which Adam did not find one that was even and like him for marriage, God said, Genesis 2:18, 21, 22: "It is not good that Adam should be alone; I will make him a helpmeet to be at his hand. And sent a deep sleep into Adam, unk took a rib from him, and closed up the flesh again, and made a woman of the same rib that he had taken from Adam, and brought her to Adam. Then said Adam, This is a bone of my legs, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called a woman, because she is taken from her husband. Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave unto his wife: and they shall be two in one flesh." These are all God's words, in which it is described where man and woman come from, how they are joined together, and what a woman is created for, and what love should be in married life.
(2) Secondly, if God Himself does not give a wife or husband, then it will be as it pleases. For this is indicated here, that Adam did not find a husband; but as soon as God had created Eve and brought her to him, he felt a right conjugal love for her and recognized that she would be his conjugal husband. Thus one should teach those who wish to enter the conjugal state to ask God with right earnestness for a conjugal spouse. For even the wise man says, Proverbs 19:14, that "goods and house may parents provide for their children, but a wife is given by God alone," after each one is worthy, just as Eve alone was given by God to Adam. And although the frivolous youth, out of the lust of the flesh, is quick in these matters, it is nevertheless a great thing in the sight of God; for it is not for nothing that the Almighty God alone gives man, above all animals, his marital status with such counsel and consideration. To the other animals he speaks badly: "Grow and multiply"; and it is not written that he brings the woman to the man; therefore there is also no marriage. But to Adam he makes a certain special wife of himself, brings her to him, gives her to him, and Adam consents and accepts her; and this then is marriage.
Thirdly, a woman is created to be a companionable helper to man in all things, especially to bring forth children. And this has remained, only that it is mixed with evil desire after the fall, and now the desire of the man for the woman, and again, is not pure. For not only company and children, for which it is used alone, but also the evil desire is almost strongly sought.
Fourthly, he distinguishes love, that the love of man and woman is, or should be, the greatest and purest love of all loves. For he says: "Father and mother
the man will leave and cling to his wife"; and again the wife also; as we see before our eyes every day. Now there are three kinds of love: false, natural, conjugal. False love seeks its own, as one loves money, goods, honor and women outside of marriage against God's commandment. Natural love is between father and child, brother and sister, friend and brother-in-law, and the like. But above them all is conjugal love, that is, a bridal love, which burns like fire and seeks no more than a conjugal spouse. It says: I do not want yours, I want neither gold nor silver, neither this nor that, I want to have you myself, I want it all or nothing. All other love seeks something else than the one it loves; this alone wants to have the beloved himself completely. And if Adam had not fallen, it would have been the sweetest thing, bride and bridegroom. But now love is not pure either. For though one spouse desires another, yet each seeks his pleasure in the other; and this counterfeits this love. For this reason the conjugal state is no longer pure and without sin, and the carnal temptation has become so great and furious that the conjugal state is now like a hospital for the sick, lest they fall into more grievous sin. For before Adam fell, it was easy to keep virginity and chastity; which is now little possible and impossible without special grace from God. For this reason, neither Christ nor the apostles wanted to enjoin chastity, but nevertheless advised it, and left it to each one to examine himself; if he is unable to keep himself, he may become legitimate; but if he is able to do so by God's grace, chastity is better.
5 Thus the doctors have invented three goods and benefits in the conjugal state, by which the sinful lust that runs with it would be restored and not condemned.
6 First, that it is a sacrament. But a sacrament means a sacred sign, which signifies something else, a spiritual, sacred, heavenly and eternal thing; just as water signifies baptism. When the priest pours it over the child, it signifies the holy, divine, and eternal grace, which is besides
is poured into the soul and body of that child and cleanses from original sin, that there may be God's kingdom within. These things are unspeakable goods and much more immeasurably greater than the water that signifies them. So also the marriage state is a sacrament, an outward, holy sign of the greatest, holiest, most worthy, noblest thing that never was or ever will be, that is, the union of divine and human nature in Christ. For the holy apostle Paul says: As the man and woman, united in matrimony, are two in one flesh: so God and mankind are one Christ; Christ also and Christendom one body. "This is indeed," he says, Eph. 5, 32, "a great sacrament," that is, the conjugal state truly means great things. Is it not a great thing that God is man, that God gives Himself to man and wants to be his; just as the man gives himself to the woman and is her? But if God is ours, then all things are ours.
(7) Behold, for the sake of the honor that the mingling of man and woman means such a great thing, the conjugal state must enjoy such importance that the evil carnal lust, which no one is without, is not condemnable in conjugal duty, which otherwise is always fatal outside of marriage, if it is spent. Thus, the holy humanity of God covers the shame of the carnal evil lust. Therefore, a married man should pay attention to such sacraments, so that this holy thing is honored and marital duties are kept moderate, so that no unreasonable consequence of carnal lust occurs, as the animals do.
8 Secondly, that it is a covenant of fidelity. This is the reason and whole essence of marriage, that one gives himself to the other and promises to be faithful and not to bring in another. Because one binds itself to the other and gives itself captive, so that it blocks all other ways for the flesh and is satisfied with one bedfellow, God sees to it that the flesh is subdued so that it does not rage crosswise through the city, and graciously allows that in such fidelity some of its lust is abated, even more than is necessary for the fruit. But that
to moderate oneself with seriousness and not to make a muck and muck chair out of it.
Here I should say what kind of words one should use when two get engaged. So the thing has been made so deep, wide and pointed that I am much too low to understand even that, and worry that many spouses sit with each other whom we consider illegitimate. For since the conjugal state stands thoroughly (i.e. in its causal ground) in one consenting to each other, and God is marvelous in His judgments, I will leave it to Him to command it. The common words are these: I am yours, you are mine. And though some think most strongly that it is not enough to say, I will or will take thee, or to use other words; yet I would rather judge according to the opinion which they had at the time. Item, if one vows to the other secretly and then takes another, publicly or secretly, I still do not know whether it is all right that one writes about it and judges. This is my advice, that parents accustom their children, that they are not ashamed to desire from them a conjugal husband; and let them know, that they want to advise them, so that they may the better abstain and persevere in hope. And again, do not betroth the children without their parents' knowledge. For are you not ashamed to ask for a skirt or a house from your parents? What are you fooling about and not asking for that which is much greater, a husband? So Samson came into a city, and saw a virgin that pleased him; and he returned home before, and said unto his father and mother, I have seen a virgin, and I love her: dear, give me the same for a husband. 14, 1. f.
010 Thirdly, that it bring forth fruit: for this is the end and chief office of marriage. But this is not enough, that the fruit is born, and therefore one does not speak of it when one says: Marriage excuses sin, for it bears such fruit also to the heathen; but that one educates the fruit for God's service, praise and honor, and seeks nothing else in it; which unfortunately seldom happens. One seeks only heirs or pleasure in the children, let God's service remain where it can. Also
One finds those who take up marriage and become a father or mother before they can pray themselves or know what God's commandments are.
(11) But let the spouses know that they can do no better work and benefit for God, for Christianity, for all the world, for themselves and for their children, than to bring up their children well. There is nothing about pilgrimages to Rome, to Jerusalem, to St. James; there is nothing about building churches, endowing masses, or whatever other works may be called, in opposition to this single work, that the married couple bring up their children. For this is their most proper road to heaven, and they may not attain heaven sooner or better than by this work. It is also their own work, and if they do not do it, it is just as wrong as if fire does not burn and water does not wet. So again, hell is not more easily deserved than in one's own children; neither may they do any harmful work, for they neglect the children, let them curse, swear, learn shameful words and songs, and live according to their will. In addition, some of them irritate themselves with superfluous adornment and promotion to the world, so that they only please the world, rise high and become rich; always take more care, how they provide the body, than the soul, enough. There is no greater harm to Christianity than to neglect the children. For if we are to help Christianity again, we must indeed begin with the children, as was done before.
(12) The third part seems to me to be the greatest and most useful, which without doubt can powerfully remove not only marital duty, but also all other sin. But the false love of nature blinds parents, so that they esteem the flesh of their children more than the soul. Therefore the wise man says, Proverbs 13:24: "He who spares the rod hastens his own child, but he who loves his child chews it up many times"; item, Cap. 22, 15: "There is in every child's heart a foolish purpose; but the rod may cast it all out"; item, Solomon, Cap. 23, 14: "If you strike your child with rods, you will deliver his soul from hell."
13 Therefore it is highly necessary for every married man to take care of his child.
He will regard his soul more, more deeply, more diligently than the flesh that came from him, and will not regard his child differently than a precious, eternal treasure, which God has commanded him to keep, so that the devil, the world and the flesh do not steal and kill him. For it will be required of him at death and the last day with a very sharp reckoning. For where do you think will come from the terrible weeping and wailing of those who will cry out, Luc. 23:29: "Blessed are the wombs that have not borne children, and the breasts that have not suckled"? No doubt because they did not bring their children back to God, from whom they received them to keep.
(14) O verily, a noble, great, blessed estate, the marriage estate, if it be rightly kept. O truly, a wretched, frightening, dangerous state, the marital state, if it is not kept right. And whoever would consider these things, the tickle of the flesh would well pass away and perhaps reach out for the virginal state as much as for the conjugal state. The youth respects it little, follows only the desires; but
God will respect it greatly and follow what is right.
Finally, if you want to atone for all your sins and obtain the highest indulgences here and there, die blessedly, and extend your lineage far and wide in time, then look with all seriousness at this third part, to educate the children well. If you cannot do it, ask and look for other people who can, and do not let money, costs, effort and work take you. For these are the churches, altars, wills, vigils and masses for souls, which you leave behind you, which will also shine for you when you die, and wherever you go.
Soli Deo Gloria (Glory to God alone).
[And so you have in the very shortest way how to begin the holy state of marriage, to keep yourself in it, with beautiful instructions, to raise the children rightly and to please God, so that every married person may obtain such great things from Almighty God and eternal bliss after this life. Preached at Wittenberg by the highly learned Doctor Martin Luther, Sanct Augustin's Order].